Did Raising Arizona teach him nothing?
On the list of things to do when your husband goes philandering, having a baby has got to be fairly low down. If not right off the page and in a whole different book, possibly the one titled ‘10 Easy Steps to Divorce’.
Water retention and constipation clearly aren’t the ways to win back a man who has been trysting with woman gusseted in Agent Provocateur. Still, it’s the road Posh Spice has taken and it’s going to be the road less travelled with husband still in tow (my prediction for 2005). And David, what’s with the overplucked ladies’ eyebrows?
Anyway, a baby should also be low down on the list for cementing your doomed relationship with a 21 year-old waitress. But still Nic Cage trundles on, rug firmly taped in place lest the warp speed of his relationship leave his pate free to the wind. Just like the words ‘J Lo’ and ‘wedding’, ‘ageing celeb’ and ‘young bride’ should have LA divorce lawyers high fiving in the corridors.
Nic is unlikely to read British tabloids but maybe it’s time to get a subscription to The Sun. The sad tale of fortysomething TV mogul Chris Evans and child bride Billie Piper might bring a tear to Nic’s eye, if the Botox hasn’t frozen up his ducts. It’s grim reading for a man hoping that wealth and status will be enough to keep the young hot wife. If getting past the tits on page 3 is a challenge, Nic only needs to tune into Desperate Housewives. Let Gabrielle be a lesson to you. The gardener may be penniless but who cares when he looks like that?
Water retention and constipation clearly aren’t the ways to win back a man who has been trysting with woman gusseted in Agent Provocateur. Still, it’s the road Posh Spice has taken and it’s going to be the road less travelled with husband still in tow (my prediction for 2005). And David, what’s with the overplucked ladies’ eyebrows?
Anyway, a baby should also be low down on the list for cementing your doomed relationship with a 21 year-old waitress. But still Nic Cage trundles on, rug firmly taped in place lest the warp speed of his relationship leave his pate free to the wind. Just like the words ‘J Lo’ and ‘wedding’, ‘ageing celeb’ and ‘young bride’ should have LA divorce lawyers high fiving in the corridors.
Nic is unlikely to read British tabloids but maybe it’s time to get a subscription to The Sun. The sad tale of fortysomething TV mogul Chris Evans and child bride Billie Piper might bring a tear to Nic’s eye, if the Botox hasn’t frozen up his ducts. It’s grim reading for a man hoping that wealth and status will be enough to keep the young hot wife. If getting past the tits on page 3 is a challenge, Nic only needs to tune into Desperate Housewives. Let Gabrielle be a lesson to you. The gardener may be penniless but who cares when he looks like that?
posted by lucky at 9:46 am
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