Queen Helen

Helen Mirren, arguably looking hotter than Her Majesty ever has, trounced the opposition to win an Oscar last night. In a town full of ageing celebrities with faces pulled tighter than a calfskin drum, Dame Helen not only triumphed in the best actress category but she also proved that grace, style and wrinkles win over surgery, Botox and butt lifts.


And her face moved, which is more than you can say for Nicole Kidman, whose features are permanently set in a beatific grin by the odd injection and a disastrous marriage. She brought hubby along to the proceedings but will she be dragging him down the carpet with her next year? I doubt it very much.

Naturally, no Hollywood evening is now complete with the original old rictus grin, aka Victoria Beckham, making an appearance. Perhaps conscious that her skinny limbs don't set her apart any more (who's famous and not skinny in LA? You can probably count them on the fingers of one bony hand), Posh covered up for once. If only she'd cover up completely. The full veil would for me.