Lessons in body language

After the Jolie-Pitt performances we've endured over the last year - 'we're standing three metres apart, with our hands in our pockets to prove we're not a couple' - we're wise to the ploys of Natalie Portman and Jake Gyllenhaal. The crossed arms and the lack of body contact mean nothing to us. The giggling and awkwardness, however, do. Likewise Petra Nemcova and James Blunt. Again hands in pockets and walking metres apart don't throw us off the scent, especially if Petra's parents are along for the ride. (They were, they're just out of shot.) If I were Petra I'd certainly be walking a few metres from James. You don't cheat death to go out with a small, whiny, weird posh bloke.