Summer madness

Summer can be an ugly time. All that white, sweaty flesh is suddenly on display for everyone to see. Naturally Hollywood stars and, in the case of Victoria Beckham, Hollywood wannabes tackle the problem in their own inimitable way. Madonna, not usually one for hiding her painfully honed flesh on stage, goes all coy on the beach and goes for a swim in some sort of mesh outfit. Out of the water, she takes the cover-up even further, suggesting that Kabbalah might be on its way out and Islam is on its way in.



And Felicity Huffman. Never mind the strange creature pawing you, whatever happened to you being the 'normal' Desperate Housewife? Suddenly you're all gym honed, sinewy and your breasts look suspiciously high and round (ie plastic).



As for Victoria Beckham. There might be rumours that the Beckhams are trying for baby number four (which is technically a very stupid move as Victoria has always favoured the cosmetic approach to childbirth - the caeserean) but she doesn't look like she can carry her handbag never mind a baby for nine months. There's thin and then there's sick and it seems like Victoria lost the ability to distinguish between the two quite some time ago.