Because we're SO not worth it

Unable to resist any chance to whore, sorry, promote the Beckham brand, David and Victoria will soon be swishing their locks and uttering "because we're worth it". The happy couple have signed up to do L'Oreal ads and follow in the august footsteps of David Ginola and Natalie Imbruglia, who are a washed up footballer and a struggling pop star. What a coincidence.

While the Beckhams can generate acres of column inches by simply getting dressed and walking (look, Victoria wearing a skirt, look, Victoria walking from the car to a shop), L'Oreal have overlooked one crucial issue. Posh's hair used to belong to a hirsute Russian Rapunzel and David is beginning to recede. As an advert for hair, they are saying either buy someone's scalpfull or shave it all off.