KO for the OC

Proof finally that money can't buy you love. The OC's most wooden performer, Mischa Barton, has dumped her rich boyfriend Brandon Davis because he lives off his family's money. Going to mummy for a monthly hand-out seems to be a surefire passion killer.

Maybe he could claw back some respect by going on a new TV show. In Survival of the Richest, wealthy parents send their sponging kids off for a few weeks' hard labour so that they learn the value of money. Cue rich whiners crying to camera as they try to brave the 'hardship' of working in salt mines and fishing trawlers. Should Brandon's mum Nancy sign him up for the show, the producers shouldn't let him do any shifts at MacDonald's. He is way too greasy as it is without sweating over congealing burgers.

From one failed relationship to one that is sure to fail some time soon. Britney Momma Spears has admitted that she's let herself go since getting married. No shit. We never thought that when we saw you traipsing barefoot into a public toilet or slugging back another double mocha iced chocolate with extra cream. Just watch Kevin run screaming when she can only fit into housedresses and slippers.