Better to have loved and been paid then never to have loved at all

Isn't it sad when love crashes and burns? The tears, the grief, the endless conversations on the phone to friends who lost the will to live at least three hours ago. So just imagine how carefree and happy Penelope Cruz and Matthew McConnaughey must feel about the end of their 'relationship' ie a Scientology arrangement to make Matthew seem a little more into the ladies than he actually is. No weeping, no sleepless nights in an empty bed, just less money. Cos the chances are that old Penelope was raking it in for her part in the 'relationship'. The Scientologists must have bunged her a couple of million to play the girlfriend for a year. And she got lots of press coverage by conveniently hooking up with McConnaughey around the release date of their film, Sahara. Don't you just love it when a plan comes together?

The question is now she's done Tom Cruise and McConnaughey, which gay Hollywood Scientologist will she sign up with next?


'Happier' times