Hello sweet Hello

What does any recently adopted child need? Time to adjust to their new family, new country and new language? No, of course not, silly. A child shipped in from an orphanage in Vietnam to Hollywood needs their own Hello spread. It's what any self-respecting child is asking for these days. Forget toys, clothes and a trip to Disney, a wildly disorientated child unable to speak to anyone in its new family is crying out for a few pages between photos of Heather Locklear's latest date and bald Britney Spears playing tennis in rehab. I hope poor Pax Thien Jolie is at least getting a cut of the reported $2m Angelina and Brad got for the pictures, if only in compensation for the God awful name.